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Joke of the Day

"[marriage counseling] He barely knows who I am anymore ""That's not true, Karen"" LINDA, MY NAME IS LINDA"

"""knock knock"" whos there ""orange"" orange who ""orange u glad im not a banana?"" .... MARTHA THERES A RACIST ORAMGE AT THE DOOR DO I LET HIM IN"

"Why did Susie fall of the swing set? Because she had no arms."

"The little old woman who lived in a shoe... ...wasn't the sole owner - there were strings attached."

"""I'd tap that."" ~tap dancer, about a song he really likes"

"What do you call an Asian person that is hit by a car? Hood orient"

"What's brown and sticky? A twig."

"2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, 17,19 etc were the years when I was in my prime."

"Lazy Dad I was shopping in Tesco with my Daughter earlier & she turned around and said ""Your such a lazy bastard dad"" I was so shocked I nearly fell out the trolley!"

"Both Christmas and New Years fell on a weekend this year, which had to suck for the four or five of you that still have jobs."