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Joke of the Day

"Called my mum to tell her I was stuck in a rut. She yells that life is tough, get on with it & hangs up. I'm now waiting on a tow truck."

"Patient: I have a strawberry lodged in my anus. Doctor: I have some cream for that."

"Hey baby, did you fall from Heaven? Because so did Satan."

"How does the Navy separate the men from the boys? With a crowbar"

"Two nuns are sitting on a park bench... Two nuns are sitting on a park bench. A man in a trench coat runs up and flashes them. The first nun has a stroke. The second nun tried but she couldn't reach."

"Wait you *must* be the aunt I've heard soooo much about. The one who looks like Freddie Mercury and laughs like a jackal. Is this her honey?"

"What are the two biggest lies a man will ever tell? 1. The check is in the mail 2. I promise I won't cum in your mouth."

"It must be pretty inconvenient when you meet someone from a dating site and you're already married to them."

"Yo mama's so fat, I swerved my car to miss her and ran out of gas."

"Joe: Hey Barack, why does Trump wanna ban preshredded cheese Barack: Joe please Joe: TO MAKE AMERICA GRATE AGAIN Barack: I swear to God"