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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a female peacock? A peacunt."

"Reading while sunbaking Makes you well-read"

"My sausage-addicted friend died in a car crash. Apparently, he took a turn for the wurst."

"I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely if architects in those days had just made their towns big enough for everyone."

"Height of complement - Lol Wife: ""I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"" Husband: ""You have perfect eyesight."""

"Beef jerky is just a cow raisin"

"A blonde women just found out some frightening statistics... She was just informed that over 90% of car accidents happen within 10 miles of the persons house. So she moved."

"Why do so many people in the South get married? Free shotgun"

"Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So people don't mistake them for feminists."

"What is the difference between a wife and a mistress? The mistress says ""Oh darling! That was *wonderful*!"" The wife says ""Beige. I think we'll paint the ceiling beige."""