21984

Joke of the Day

"How to get rid of crabs First, shave off half your pubes. Then light the other half on fire, as they run to the shaved side, stab them with a knife."

"I got caught masturbating recently, to a National Geographic magazine. I don't know who was more embarrassed me or my dentist."

"I visited Amsterdam this summer, and decided to have sex with a prostitute. It was an overall positive experience. Sadly, it was an HIV positive experience."

"What do you call a group of people from Idaho? Deydahoes."

"""Jess is coming over"" ""Jess who indiscriminately murders people or-"" *Gets stabbed to death* ""Yes"""

"If you haven't woken up from a nap covered in stickers, did you even fall asleep while watching cartoons with your preschooler."

"Two antennas fell in love.. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent."

"What was the smoking bee full of? Nicosting!"

"I'm taking your mom to the new British dollar store Pound Town."

"I went to a bar with my girlfriend last night and people kept calling me a pedophile, just because I'm 53 and she is 22... ...totally ruined our 10th anniversary."