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Joke of the Day

"I don't need a girlfriend, I can just play Pokemon Go The servers go down on me every day"

"I dont know about you guys, but I am amazed Pringles is able to constantly grow the same shaped potato. Science."

"I tried to be a pornstar But apparently that type of content breaks Terms of Service on Vine"

"As I've gotten older, every time I look in the mirror I see my dad more and more. I guess its time to move out, its starting to get weird."

"Hello Darkness, my old frie- *the lights suddenly turn on* oh it's like that now?"

"The man entered his home... and was absolutely delighted when he discovered someone had stolen every lamp in the house."

"What do you call a green man sitting on my porch? My n*gger and I'll paint him whatever color I want."

"Never trust an atom They make up everything."

"Why can you RAN in a campsite, but never RUN in a campsite? Because it's always past-tents."

"Oscar Pistorius really wanted a new bathroom door but his girlfriend was dead against it."