219420

Joke of the Day

"Catch a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish (read the rest as Groucho Marx) and you'll never see him on the weekends."

"What do you call a group of kangaroos? A Kangacrew"

"English people smh... 75% of English people do not know the opposites to these words. Always Coming From Take Me Down"

"Why was oedipus against profanity Because he kisses his mother with that mouth"

"What should we name this ancient Japanese throwing knife? A: Let's just name it the first thing that comes to mind, think you can handle that? B: Sure I can."

"What's big, black and loaded with aids? A new Cadillac Escalade with cruise control, lane alert, navigation, downhill descent control and parking assist."

"gross i hate the word moist! give me a wet cake. give me a wet, damp cupcake"

"A teacher asked a spanish immigrant student to make a sentence using the words cheese and liver.... ...The immigrant replies: ""Hey liver alone, cheese my sister"""

"Did you hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither did he."

"Sometimes, by holding on too tight, you end up losing what you were trying so hard to save. Soap, for example."