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Joke of the Day
"I don't get people that talk to themselves"
Next Joke
"I've been making an effort lately to be better with women. I'm trying to be more assertive, as well as insertive."
"What do Hillary and Bill have in common? Both got screwed out of office"
"Some people are named after where they were conceived. For example Brooklyn, Paris... My friend Ally doesn't agree."
"[creation] GOD: You each have a gift WORM: What's mine? G: You...spin silk BEE: How bout me? G: Uh...make honey HIPPO: And me? G: Hm...eat marbles"
"English, if I ran it: A group of geese is called a ""group"" A group of buffalo is called a ""group"" A group of catfish is called a ""group"""
"What does an Apple Watch do when it gets hungry? It goes back four seconds."
"I hate it when I pee in my pants and people think its just water that splashed on my crotch from washing my hands."
"My love is like communism; everyone gets a share, and it's only good in theory."
"How many idiots does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question. Idiots can't screw in lightbulbs regardless of help from other idiots."