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Joke of the Day

"I work for a company who specialises in vacuum packed marine mammals. We're famous for our airtight seal."

"A G N B: That's bang out of order."

"How do the jews comunicate? With smoke signals"

"It be cool if that Malaysia plane appeared with Amelia Earhart flying it back"

"How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It doesn't matter they don't have any power."

"Did you hear about the granny who plugged her electric blanket into the toaster by mistake? She spent the night popping out of bed."

"People always comment about how young I look. I just tell them it's because of all the placenta I've been eating."

"What do you call a redneck with two sheep? A Pimp"

"Robbing a bank in Greece is like raiding a food warehouse in Uganda. You look stupid and you get nothing out of it."

"[NSFW] Do you know what really brings out the child in me? A miscarriage."