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Joke of the Day
"I like my chairs the way I like my women Quiet and conforming to my body"
Next Joke
"Give a man a subtweet and he'll be like ""is this about me?"" Teach a man to subtweet you'll be like ""is that about me?"""
"If you tickle a billionaire, will he trickle himself?"
"A boy has a stunning realization and confronts his mother Boy: Mum! Why am I black and you're white? Mum: Considering all the crazy shit I've done years ago, you should be glad you aren't barking"
"We can't afford to take our kids to a corn maze this year so we're going to take them to an IKEA instead."
"What do you call an English teacher five feet tall covered from head to toe in boils and totally bald? Sir!"
"If you say ""Unique New York"" (5 times fast) is it easy or hard?"
"A drum set falls out of a window... Ba dum tssh!"
"I've never been to Japan, but I've seen a bunch of emojis so I think I get the idea."
"My friend's new girlfriend A buddy of mine was telling me about his new girlfriend, particularly that she likes to bake Italian bread and plays on a baseball team. I asked, ""Ciabatta?"""