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Joke of the Day
"My buddy asked me what self explanatory meant... I didn't know what to say."
Next Joke
"Why can't you make a movie with with Jewish people smoking weed? You can't show a group of Jews getting baked"
"I tried to shuffle a pile of Ibuprofen I guess drug dealing just isn't for me."
"How do you get an emo out of a tree? Cut the rope imsosorry:("
"It's actually pretty easy to win an argument with a woman when you wait until she's not around to have it."
"Nostalgia isn't what it used to be."
"My goal for 2017.... ....is to accomplish the goals of 2016 which I should have done in 2015 because I made a promise in 2014 and planned in 2013"
"Knock Knock.... -Knock Knock... -Who's There -Panther -Panther who? -Panther no pants, I'm going swimming!"
"Why are hurricanes named after women? Because they come in wet and wild, and leave with your house and car."
"Once my gym teacher told me ""you are what you eat."" I Immediately replied ""you callin' me a pussy?"""