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Joke of the Day

"Her: I'm so wet Him: I'm so hard Eavesdropping alien: These people are bad at describing themselves."

"STAR WARS SPOILERS Admiral Ackbar has gained quite a bit of weight and everyone calls him ""Admiral Snackbar"""

"What's thick, black, and over a foot long? My roommate's asian girlfriend's hair clogging the fucking shower drain."

"When I was young, I grew up in a theme park.. The theme of the park was trailer."

"There's a new police bar in town. I hear it's very copular."

"Blood's thicker than water, so remember to pull back on the flour a bit when you substitute it into your baking."

"When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesnt get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out."

"What language do fast talkers from Moscow speak? *Rush*ian!"

"Did you hear Clinton has a girlfriend? ...they think Bill might have one too."

"The Australian border patrol is so good... they even stop the good internet from reaching Australia."