216103

Joke of the Day

"If Patrick Bateman from American Psycho had a butler, what would the butler call him? ""Master Bateman."""

"A child gets a toy Ferrari stuck in his belly button... ... it wouldn't be a problem if it was an Audi."

"The iPhone 7 is an of all trades Sorry, I meant ""jack of all trades"" but there's no more jack."

"My friend's dog died the other day so I surprised her by going out and getting her an identical dog. She was furious, she said ""what am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?"""

"Whats up r/jokes? Not march."

"What is Jeb Bush's campaign slogan? Third time's the charm"

"Two men were remembering their wedding days. ""It was dreadful"" said Fred. ""I got the most terrible fright."" ""What happened?"" asked Harry. ""I married her"" replied Fred."

"How can you a drop a egg on concrete without cracking it? Anyway you want. Concrete doesn't break easily."

"These days, satisfying my sex drive is like using Uber. It's a nervous ride with a stranger who expects to be paid after we reach the end."

"*Ubers to my parking spot at Costco*"