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Joke of the Day

"Why did the janitor get fired from the bank? Because he cleaned out the vault."

"What does a triangular acorn say when it grows up? Geometry."

"Guys love it when you rest your head on their shoulder at the movie theatre. Their girlfriends however... not so much."

"Got so wasted last night, had to take a train home. And now I can't figure out how to return it."

"Whats the Difference between an Atheist, a Christian and a Dog? DogMa"

"*co-worker approaching elevator* *I try to hit ""close door"" button* *I miss, hit ""open door""* Co-worker: thanks for holding it Me: Of course"

"If Batman gets to use a piece of Kryptonite against Superman, Superman should get to use a piece of Batman's parents. Fair is fair."

"There are 2 LOSERS who hang out at the same sidewalk corner everyday... The taller LOSER says to the other ""Hey man, have you seen my keys?"". The other LOSER replies, ""No, have you seen my wallet?""."

"You wont find a whole lot about beastiality in the bible. But you will in my diary."

"What has a beginning and an end, but nothing in the middle? Life"