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Joke of the Day

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to screw in a lightbulb? YOU DON'T KNOW MAN, YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!!"

"I finally found out why clickbait is so effective."

"6 yo: *yells* Mom! I'm on level 18!!!! Me: *peeks in room* PAGE 18, princess. You're reading. 6 yo: Oh"

"sometimes i wonder was it worth it to get laid at the expense of covering my firewood pile when it was about to rain? no... it never is"

"The only thing i understood from Interstellar [spoiler] that the fifth dimension is a FUCKING BOOK CASE"

"Dad: Why is your January report card so bad ? Son: Well you know how it is. Things are always marked down after Christmas !"

"If scientists weren't so busy advancing yogurt technology, we'd have flying cars by now."

"Personally, I'm fine with what Reddit's admins are doing. It's fun watching them Digg their own grave."

"I started studying art history. I'm really learning a lot. This painter named 'Renaissance' is just amazing."

"I don't watch Soccer... If I wanted to watch somebody struggle to score for 90 minutes I'd take my friends out to the bar."