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Joke of the Day

"Has anyone seen the movie Constipated? No? Thats because it never came out..."

"My professor really snapped yesterday, went all crazy on the blackboard during math lecture He really did a number on it. Its days are numbered now. Edit: grammar"

"In baseball, why does it take longer to get from second to third than any other bases? Because there's a short stop in between."

"Why don't black people get sunburns? Prisons are indoors. *(sorry black redditors)*"

"I tell my daughter she has no idea how lucky she is. When I was 12, I had to use a pay phone and walk 10 miles in the snow to get weed"

"Between Trump and Clinton, who is more likely to start a nuclear war if elected president? America, with the missiles aimed at ourselves."

"What's both blue and purple and never seen again? This thread :/"

"What was Amanda Todd's favourite anime? Naruto."

"What happens When a Pigeoner and a Falconer move in next door Feathers get ruffled"

"Honey, can we skip that wedding this weekend? ""What? Why?"" It sounds boring and there's no way that couple makes it.. ""It's OUR wedding!"""