211997

Joke of the Day

"There is no ""I"" in ""team."" But there's an ""I"" in ""Tim,"" and my friend Carlos pronounces it ""team."" So there."

"Ever wondered why china has over 1 billion population? Cause the condom they use is ""Made in china"""

"All women have an hour glass figure - it's just that they all tote around different amounts of sand."

"Did you hear about the Holy Cow? Some say he was legend-dairy."

"What's a skunk's philosophy of life? Eat stink and be merry!"

"Hoes looking for attention... Haters looking for a mention... Welcome to Facebook."

"They really should have predicted the fall of Communism sooner. After all, there were plenty of red flags."

"I would literally never feel confident enough to drop a piece of equipment as expensive as a mic."

"""You're mother."" (thing to say to your mother)."

"Ordering at Chipotle: ""With white rice."" ""Brown?"" ""No, white. And chicken."" ""Steak?"" ""No, chicken. And medium salsa."" ""Mild?"" ""No, medium."""