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Joke of the Day

"i wish my grandmother was alive to see the iPad air her mind would have been absolutely BLOWN AWAY. she loved her gen 4 iPad."

"Why do women always say they want a man with a stable job? What's so glamorous about cleaning up after horses?"

"There's nothing more difficult than trying to convince a narcissist that you don't like them."

"What do you call a black prince? A british tank you racist."

"I love waking up to the sound of birds arguing with their spouses."

"America as a whole is pretty bad at geometry... We're all out of shape."

"Why hasn't Donald Trump ever finished a novel? Because he always gets stuck in Chapter 11."

"Get your therapist to start taking you seriously by pulling a donut out of your purse."

"Lord please give me patience, because if you give me strength I may just beat someone to death."

"How many people from Quebec does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One: He holds the bulb and the rest of Canada revolves around him."