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Joke of the Day
"I also like my women like I like my coffee... ...cheaply imported from Brazil"
Next Joke
"Hot singles in your area are tired of it all. Just so tired."
"I had a call from a charity asking me to donate old clothes for starving people. I told them anybody who fits into my clothes isn't starving"
"I need to get off my high horse. He's certainly in no condition to take me anywhere right now. Get yourself together, junkie."
"[SPELLING BEE] JUDGE: Bourgeoisie ME: Really? W o w JUDGE: *annoyed* Sir, the word is Bourgeoisie ME:*clears throat* Eff - U - See - Kay - U"
"I wonder if Ninja-Siri wields Cortanas."
"On a scale of 10 to 10, how good am I at giving you a choice?"
"I often find myself crying during sex... Probably from the pepper spray..."
"Tell her you already got her gift, & ask her to try & guess. Then go buy something she guessed. Shopping made easy."
"What do you call a boxer with an upset stomach? Gaseous Clay"