2096

Joke of the Day

"Yeah, I guess you could say I ""rescued"" my dog. I did stop him right before he was gonna start his own podcast"

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question. Feminists can't change shit."

"Quitting twitter is the adult version of running away from home. We ALL know you're doing it for attention and we ALL know you'll be back."

"Why couldn't the melons be together? Everyone knows melons cantaloupe."

"News Anchor: Our correspondent at the scene had this to say. *cut to correspondent* Correspondent: This."

"How Did Norse Marsupials Write Their Sagas? In Kangarunes."

"Just saw the little boy next door licking whip cream off the cat. Pretty sure he heard something he shouldn't have."

"what was hitler's favorite weather pattern? HEIL"

"Happy Mothers Day We love all you mothers."

"I went to the zoo the other day, There was only one dog in it. It was a shitzu."