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Joke of the Day

"So here I am in the Internet Cafe... ... with the angriest, ugliest bastard I've ever seen reading every word I ty"

"A horse walks into a bar... The bartender asks, ""Why the long face?"" The horse replies, ""My alcoholism is destroying my family."""

"There is one good thing about pedophiles... its that they drive slowly when going past a school."

"What do you call a Tungsten Holmium compound with a Doctorate? Doctor WHo"

"How do you find Will Smith after a snowstorm? Just look for the fresh prints."

"the chinese food place by my work is dangerously close to being added to my 'never again' list after finding a human tooth in my food"

"How do snowmen get around? By icicle."

"Did you hear about the guy from Newfoundland who was twenty-two years old before he knew which part of the olive to throw away?"

"Today my dad died in a scuba accident It was a very depressing situation"

"My ransom was dropped from $30,000 to fifty bucks when my parents told my kidnappers it'd take 2 days to come up with the money."