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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a lousy psychic? Telepathetic."
Next Joke
"More people die from choking on sweet packaging than they do from the sweets themselves... Gums don't kill people. Wrappers do."
"Gave up on my dream of being a murderer a long time ago. I leave long hair everywhere & everyone knows its mine without doing a DNA test."
"Escalator Literature. a step by step guide to reaching new levels"
"""What are you doing? Are you writing down everything I'm saying?! IS THIS GONNA BE A SONG?!?!"" -anyone dating Taylor Swift"
"How i made my computer run faster... I painted it black."
"Why couldn't Robin play cricket? Because he lost his bat, man."
"How do you know your wife is getting vat... ... you have to switch off the light during sex. Not because she's ugly but because the bulb burns your ass."
"""Just because you can't dance, doesn't mean you shouldn't dance."" -Alcohol"
"I was in the supermarket and I thought I saw my name on a loaf of bread. I looked again and it said ""thick cut""."