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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, agnostic and an insomniac? A person who stays up all night contemplating the existence of dog."

"Could you guys not make jokes about the holocaust here? My grandfather died in the holocaust, and it's really offending me. He fell out of one of the guard towers at Auschwitz"

"What do you call a french racist? A beget!"

"What website do emo kids use for business networking? LinkedIn Park"

"Two goldfish were in their tank... Two goldfish were in their tank. One turned to the other and said, ""You man the guns; I'll drive."""

"A man visits his local dentist. Dentist: Now please take a seat, this will hurt a little. Patient: Ok. Dentist: I've been having an affair with your wife for a while now."

"I have a new alter ego named Princess of Optimism. You may call me Poo."

"Why non-smokers don't take bubble blowing breaks is beyond me"

"Why was Sean Connery accused of piracy while drinking tea? He took a ship."

"Mechanic: you need a new carburetor Me: you can call it a buretor, I know lots about cars, I'm like you"