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Joke of the Day

"Getting rid of my cleaning person sounded like a good way to save money, until it came time to do the cleaning."

"What do Green Eggs and Ham, and Fifty Shades of Gray have in common? They both encourage people who can barely read to try new things."

"Buy her some chocolate If your girlfriend keeps on bugging you to buy her something, keep buying chocolate, it can put her to deep sleep forever."

"Why is proctology called proctology? Because analogy was already taken."

"2+2=5 for extremely large values of 2."

"What did the mouse say to the webcam? Cheese."

"When someone says ""surprise me"", I immediately drop my pants and start singing its raining men."

"What do you call someone who is always disagreeing with their calculator? A chronic math debater"

"Why did the Nevada skunk cross the state border? To follow the smell of legal dank skunk buds."

"Brains aren't everything. In your case they're nothing."