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Joke of the Day

"My first memory was 9 months before I was born. I went to this crazy party with dad and left with mom."

"Why is North Korea disliked by South Korea? It's because they are a Seoulless nation."

"how much would it cost? ""the guy who does our estimates isn't here right now"" around what time will he be back? ""did you not just hear me?"""

"The Dallas gunman was a bit late. I know he wanted red whites in blue, but the 4th of July was like a week and a half ago."

"Chuck Norris's show is called Walker: Texas Ranger, because Chuck Norris doesn't run."

"We should stop making jokes out of Harambe Those jokes are dead anyways"

"My autopsy is going to be surprising as hell because I am 100% filled with mashed potatoes"

"What do a walrus and tupperware have in common? Both lookin for a tight seal."

"Ughh so pissed off. My mail order bride is pretending she doesn't speak english just so she doesn't have to wear the jester outfit again."

"I didnt know how to tell this guy at Home Depot his fly was down... and he didnt know how to say thanks when I tried to help him zip it up."