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Joke of the Day

"I hate it when I go to hide out from my kids in the walk-in closet & my husband is already in there hiding out from me."

"I'm a very old fashioned kind of guy (i'll kill you and steal your spices)"

"So I met a woman with 12 boobs... [NSFW] Oh, that joke needs a punchline doesn't tit."

"What do you call a white man flying a plane? Clive, usually."

"Hey Girl is your Dad an Astronaut??Because I'm from Nasa. There has been a terrible accident at the Space Station and he is dead"

"People who unfollow me always seem startled when I show up at their home to conduct an exit interview"

"Hickory Dickory Dock... Three mice ran up the clock The clock struck one But the rest escaped with minor injuries. (Something my grandfather told me when I was five)"

"I love the gym this time of year. The newbies make me look like a Victoria Secret model."

"Its such a shame todays world is so politically correct, you cant even say Black Paint anymore, Instead you have to say ""Leeroy please paint the porch"""

"I'd like to dedicate this award to gravity. You've always kept me down to earth."