204923

Joke of the Day

"Don't forget to get married because a non-existent supreme being wants you to go against your primal nature."

"Why does a rooster watch TV ? For hentertainment !"

"*genie appears* I wish I was rich! GRANTED! YOU USED TO BE RICH ok!wait what? FOR YOUR SECOND WISH, CONSIDER HAVING PAID ATTENTION IN CLASS"

"[pulled over] COP 1: any drugs or alcohol in the car? ME: no COP 2: told you he was a nerd ME: nuh uh I have so much drugs COP 1: lol gotcha"

"ME: my wife eats all the caramel corn and leaves the cheese JUDGE: give this man full custody of the kids ME: no wait they do the same thing"

"Chuck Norris can taste lies."

"I know Muslims can't eat pork. Islam ok though?"

"Drugs don't kill people, people who run out of drugs kill people"

"What do you get when a ghost takes a crap? Rectoplasm."

"A lot of schools are back in session. Remember if you study hard enough there will still be no jobs when you graduate."