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Joke of the Day
"What did one rock pool say to the other rock pool? Show me your mussels."
Next Joke
"Today's date: 4/9/16 2 squares/3 squares/4 squares 4/9/16"
"Pirates and the Alphabet How come pirates can't say the alphabet? They always get lost at ""c""."
"When I found out my girlfriend was having a baby my life really changed. specifically my name, address and phone number."
"Q: Why did the New Yorker sleep under an oil tank? A: He wanted to wake up oily."
"How do you impress a girl? By growing up."
"I couldn't be a Step-Father. I don't drink enough."
"What do you call a prostitude asking for a ride? A Hictchooker"
"Almost 65% of statistics are made up. The other half are lies."
"How do you get a 12 yr old to cry twice? (x-post from comments) Wipe your bloody dick on her teddy bear. And I'm off to hell."