204499

Joke of the Day

"I drank my recommended amount of water today, yay! Okay, well there was some vodka mixed in every cup, but still."

"""Opening a llama acting school called 'Save the Drama for your Llama."" ""No, I mean where do you see yourself in 5 years with this job?"""

"What did Ernie say to Bert when he asked for ice-cream? Sure, Bert!"

"Why do mice have small balls? Not many of them know how to dance."

"My girlfriend's got conjunctionitis It makes her 'ands swell up"

"If you accidentally get stuck holding the door for a bunch of people. 1. Relax 2. Accept your fate 3. You are part of the building now"

"The Albanian planted lightbulbs in his garden. He heard that tulips grew from bulbs."

"What is your favorite joke that's so bad it has become funny again?"

"What did Dj Khaled say to the barn owl? You talonted"

"Apple is going to release the first smart vacuum cleaner this year The first Apple product that doesn't suck (not hating on apple or anything but i got this joke somewhere)"