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Joke of the Day
"What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Damn"
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"How do you get an elephant out of a Safeway? You take the '*F*' out of '*Safe*', and the '*F*' out of '*way*'."
"Why do French tanks have rear view mirrors? So they can see the battle."
"2 guys are in a public bathroom One is white, and the other is black. The white guy says across the wall, ""This water is cold!"" to which the black guy replies, ""It's deep too!"""
"People come up to me all the time in the street and they ask me, they ask me: ""Say, Paul, what's the Mahabharata?"" And I say to them, I say, ""Oh, just a bit of light reading."""
"I try to buy American, but I just can't find a good domestic finger trap."
"What is the difference between a black and a bucket of shit? The bucket."
"Why do jews have big noses? Because air is free."
"What do gays and Donald Trump have in common? They're fucking assholes."
"Her: hear that? Me: nope Her: what if someone's is trying to get in to murder me? Me: only person that wants to murder you is already inside"