203009

Joke of the Day

"The first time I had sex I cried I don't know whether it was the physical contact, emotional connection, or pepper spray but any way I teared up."

"""This work simply does not deserve an A,"" my teacher said, berating me."

"Have you guys heard of the new ska/dubstep band? first they drop the bass. then they pickitup-pickitup-pickitup!"

"White people don't shoot each other in the streets like black people do. We do it in schools, because we have class."

"What do you call a herd of masturbating cattle? Beef Strokenoff"

"Apparently, women in muslim countries can't drive. They can't do it here either."

"What a man How do you respond to someone who says ""fuck you"" Answer: You fuck you"

"What do you call a slutty telescope? A horoscope."

"If he doesn't return your texts, it's because he's busy leaving his wife for you. Obviously."

"The year is 2072. Numbers have lost all meaning. It could be 3247 for all they know. ""It's 5486,"" says one guy, but it could've been 8 guys."