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Joke of the Day

"Made a friend today. Well, I knocked on my window when a guy walked past my house. I'll name him Terry."

"7/11 Was a part-time job."

"Quitting smoking is a lot like getting out of a relationship. It's a sad and slow realization of all of the things that you used to like to do it after."

"Two fleas where running across the top of a cereal packet ? ""Why are we running so fast ?"" said one Because it says ""Tear along the dotted line"""

"Ever wondered why written jokes about mailmen are generally unfunny? They are all about delivery."

"How did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate food before it was cool"

"Kanye deleted all the slander like we didn't have an hour to grab screenshots and make power point presentations"

"Why didn't the weightlifter like doing chest exercises with Coke cans? Because it was soda pressing."

"Why did the stoplight turn red? Well, you would too, if you had to change in front of that many people!"

"Have you ever tried eating a clock? I heard it might be time consuming."