202710

Joke of the Day

"I didn't make this joke up myself.. I reddit somewhere. My coworker said that about me and thought I'd share :)"

"What's a sailor's least favorite color? Maroon"

"The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense."

"My son was thrown out of school today.... for letting a girl in his class wank him off. I said ""son, that's three schools this year. Maybe teaching isn't for you"""

"So Elon Musk, Chris Pratt, and Neil deGrasse Tysons walk into a bar.... There's no punchline just give me upvotes."

"In awkward situations I'll sometimes break out my braille version of Calvin and Hobbes. You know - comic relief."

"I don't like the idea of having to go on in a world where good people like Robin Williams is no longer with us, but Justin Beiber is still alive and well."

"What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Hell if I know!"

"Old people always poke me at weddings and say ""you're next."" I do the same thing to them at funerals"

"Did you see the video of the woman on her period with a yeast infection? It was bloodcurdling."