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Joke of the Day

"How do you cancel your appointment at the spermicides bank? You call and say you can't cum. Edit:typo"

"You're supposed to exercise so that you can live longer but if you have to exercise all the time do you really want to live longer?"

"A rabbi, a priest, and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them for a minute and says, ""What is this, a joke?"""

"If every day is a gift, I'd have to say today was a Fruitcake from Last Year Day. Recycled, disappointing and held together by booze."

"WELL IF BEING DISCHARGED FROM THE HOSPITAL ISNT THE BEST TIME TO ASK ABOUT A THREESOME THEN IM FRESH OUT OF IDEAS"

"Just flew in from a masturbation convention... Man my arm is tired."

"What's the difference between a canoe and a Jew? Canoes tip."

"[Person who spends 20 hours per week in the gym] ""The trick is to drink 8 glasses of water a day."""

"Oldie but goody... What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Christopher Walken"

"I think it's unfair that when a human eats uncooked fish it's ""sushi,"" but when a fish eats uncooked human, it's ""a shark attack."""