202034
Joke of the Day
"Why is gravity so weak? Because it doesn't lift"
Next Joke
"Can I ask you a quick question? What is the quickest way to the front page?"
"It's ironic how the Segway-driving chinese cameraman plowed into the fastest man alive... ...because he ran into a bolt."
"My daughter is late coming down to breakfast. Her 3 strips of bacon are getting cold. I mean 2 strips. Sorry, 1 strip. She'll have cereal."
"Hi. This is my first time at yoga. When I called they said to bring a Matt. *points at man standing next to her* Now what do we do with him?"
"[Bunch of 6 year olds knock on my door] ""TRICK OR TREAT!"" You kids are in for a real treat... *slips each of them a copy of my demo tape*"
"What key won't let you through any doors? A turkey."
"What did the penis say to the condom? ""Cover me. I'm going in."""
"What is Mexico's favorite sport? Cross country"
"i have been trying to teach my dog to speak English.... but his skills are ruff"