200569

Joke of the Day

"Awkward=when autocorrect changes 'sooner' to 'sober' so email to 8 yr. old's teacher reads ""I apologize for not getting back to you sober"""

"My friend told me I wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. I told him I'm not a tool or in a shed. Sure showed him."

"What did Dorothy do to the mean Asian Munchkin? She swallowed the yellow prick's load."

"How long does it take for a woman to have an orgasm? Who cares?"

"Where does Chewbacca research his college essays? Wookiepedia"

"Why does Naruto vomit after every meal? He's **BULIMIC!**"

"I come from a long line of people waiting to get in."

"Donald Trump doesn't want to have sex with his daughter He just has ""alternative family values"""

"Why did the cowboy ride his horse? Because the horse was too heavy to carry."

"What do you call a shitty band that only plays in the winter? Coldplay."