200328
Joke of the Day
"I can already hear Monday morning whispering Go F***Yourself in my ear."
Next Joke
"What do you call a big pile of kittens? A meowtain."
"""GET A TREE"" - what I just yelled at two squirrels doing it on my lawn"
"I asked my Chinese girlfriend for a 69 last night. She said 'Fuck off, I'm not cooking at this time of night'"
"What did the Mod say to OP? [deleted]"
"I could literally eat every day and not get sick of it."
"I don't understand romantic movies, why waste all that time with the complicated, man-hating main character when her slut friend is cuter."
"Don't you hate when someone has a great tweet idea, but they TOTALLY fuck up the wording, and it's you?"
"What's the difference between a horny man and a vampire? Vampires don't come inside without permission"
"What's the difference between a ginger girl and a vampire? One bursts into flames in the sunlight, and the other is a vampire."