199810

Joke of the Day

"I used to by my dad a neck tie on father's day, but now I buy him an Asian hooker. It's better to buy a Thai that he'll actually use."

"LPT: The best time to stand behind someone is when they are watching something that makes them think it is their imagination."

"Never! And i mean never! say the word ""Bnag"" It's bang out of order."

"How many Dependent P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb? None he's still clinging to the old lightbulb."

"Found another spider in my bedroom, so now I'm on the curb watching my house burn down."

"What do you get if you breed a Green Lantern, a car and an atheist? Willing suspension of disbelief"

"What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So you're the one!"

"A man walks into a bar. He bashed his head. What did you think would have happened?"

"Just once, I want someone to look at me and say, ""That's her. She's the one"" And not follow it with ""who ate cake out of the garbage"""

"Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There's no need to remind him every 6 months about it."