198840

Joke of the Day

"me (checkin out at grocery store with 2 rotisserie chickens): hold up *i grab my phone although it didn't ring* sure i'll get 1 more chicken"

"Removed all the mirrors from my house because I'm tired of living with that asshole."

"A man walks into a seafood shop carrying a trout under his arm. ""do you make fish cakes?"" ""Yes we do"" replies the fishmonger... ""Great"" says the man, it's his birthday"""

"They say in 1990 a vagina almost took Bill Clinton down Now it looks like a weiner may take Hillary"

"""anyone for turkey burgers?"" turkey: well sure haha ""oh, it's not a burger for turkeys"" turkey: what is it then ""uhh"" turkey: say it"

"Did you hear about the guy who accidently used super glue instead of lube while having sex? He's now a man trapped in a woman's body.."

"I am a Chinese, and this is what I think about Chinese joke: Hao funny. (Hao means """", which can mean yes, good or very)"

"In the middle of a really messy divorce, I decided suicide was the only option. I just need to talk her into it now."

"Waiter to four women at his table in a restaurant in Boca Raton. ""Hello ladies, is ANYTHING okay?"""

"What's the difference between beekeeping and falconry? Falconers have to be more talon-ted"