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Joke of the Day

"Do you know why I only date black girls? Because I hate the awkwardness of meeting a girlfriend's dad"

"I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already"

"I was addicted to the Hokey Pokey but I turned myself around."

"Why do you need to carry radioactive materials in sealed, lead containers? To stop it from falling out."

"I like your name Thanks I got it for my birthday"

"I want to congratulate every couple that has gotten to the stage in their relationship where they just stare at each other in disgust."

"""I donno. America's Got Ghosts?"" -- someone in charge of a channel I probably pay $10 a year for and never watch."

"What do you call a practice exercise preparing for the possibility of observing hole-making tools undergoing a military parade? Drill drill drill."

"I'm not sexist. Being sexist is wrong and being wrong is for woman."

"What's the difference between a Hippo and a Zippo? A Hippo is heavy and a Zippo is a little lighter."