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Joke of the Day

"While everyone is busy complaining about their tweets being stolen & put on Facebook, I've quietly become the funniest person on MySpace!"

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"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bjorn ! Bjorn who ? Bjorn with a silver spoon in his mouth !"
"What do you call a line of hundreds of rabbits, moving backwards slowly? A receding hareline"
"How did the nucleus escape from prison? Through the cell wall. I'm sorry. This was just too wonderful to resist sharing."
"When someone rings the doorbell I say to my kids, ""I think it's Santa Claus!"" so I don't have to get up."
"Basic Instinct Star Cast in ""The Carpenters"" Biopic This summer: SHARON IS KAREN"
"Our son came home one day with a note from his first grade teacher: Your son bit another boy today. Is he getting enough to eat at home ?"
"what's the difference between a slut and a bitch a slut fucks everybody, a bitch fucks everybody but me ;P"
"[me on my death bed after being trampled at a one direction concert] please tell people it was auto erotic asphyxiation"
"What's the difference between Bluetooth and The Titanic? The Titanic sinks."
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