197925

Joke of the Day

"Whoever called it Thor 2 and not Keeping Up With The Asgardians is an idiot."

"Whoever invented ""knock knock"" jokes Should get a ""no-bell"" prize."

"When folks unfollow me shortly after they've followed me I just figure they sobered up."

"We can play Yahtzee again. -You fixed the broken dice? Yeah. And they'll never break again. -How do you know? *grins* Die mends are forever."

"Whats so special about ""demon cats""? Aren't all cats pure evil?"

"I'm getting mighty fed up with these sheep-human hybrids! What is with ewe people!?"

"Die Hard What happens when you overdose on viagra"

"I'm still not sure how the church expects me to do all that kneeling and standing and praying on just that one little wafer they feed you."

"That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, hit a lamp, and kill your mum."

"Won a time machine on Ebay. Disappointed when I received a clock."