197614

Joke of the Day

"Q: How do you know when there's a elephant under your bed? A: Your nose is pressed against the ceiling."

"Little known fact: Henry Ford called it an automobile because ""Horse with no Name"" sounded stupid."

"Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account."

"Want to hear a dumb, old joke? Hillary Clinton. Want to hear a dumber, older joke? Wherefore doth the chicken cross the road? Want to hear the oldest, dumbest joke I've heard? Donald Trump."

"All I want in this world is some one I can turn to and yell, ""Avenge Me!!"" if I'm dying or wrongly accused of a crime. Oh and rocket shoes"

"In this era of excessive exclamation point use, punctuating a text with a period is the quickest and simplest way to cause concern."

"They say that 15% of males don't get enough fibre in their diet... ...I guess it's tough shit for them!"

"Why does ISIS drink instant coffee? Because they hate French press!"

"Why did the man with one hand cross the road? To get to the second hand shop!"

"What do you get if you cross an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac? Someone who lays awake at night, wondering if there is a dog."