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Joke of the Day

"I remember one time my uncle asked me to spell ""schadenfreude"", and I couldn't. But he's dead now and I'm not, so I win."

"Your secrets are safe with me, because I probably wasn't listening to begin with."

"Me: Hi. Can I help you? Him: I'm here about the wanted ad for the one night stand Me: Great. Where is it? Him: What? Me: The nightstand."

"the racists in this town are so proud of their lack of pigmentation you'd think they had actually chose it themselves :)"

"What did they change the name of the gay bar in Orlando to? No Pulse"

"Is it racist if a guy with a small dick calls it his ding dong?"

"What does a Buddhist order from a hotdogs vendor? One with everything"

"Damn Girl, did you just get in a water balloon fight or are you happy to see me?"

"Hello. I'm the guy who sleepeats thousands of spiders every year and screws up the average for everyone. Sorry for scaring you."

"Bob's volunteered to give a C programming workshop but needs a topic Give that man some pointers"