196660

Joke of the Day

"Don't you hate it when people answer their own questions? I know I do."

"Do you know where there are only 239 beans in and Irish bean stew? Because if there was one more, it'd be too farty."

"My friend David lost his ID... Now we just call him Dav."

"A friend's father had been using LOL to mean lots of love. This explained such messages as ""Your grandmother's in the hospital. LOL."""

"There's no time like the present. Or later. Later on is pretty similar, actually."

"Don't be easy to get because you'll be easy to forget."

"How do you get a fat lady in a car? Piece of cake."

"Cashier: find everything okay? Me: yes [comes back 5 hours later] Me: [through the tears] i lied, i've been trying to find Kony since 2012"

"The amount of stuff coming out of this woman's handbag as she searched for her keys, I wouldn't be surprised if that missing Malaysian plane is in there too."

"It smells like updog in this sub."