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Joke of the Day

"How many Freudians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the bulb, and the other to hold the penis. LADDER! I MEANT LADDER!"

"5 out of six researchers conclude, Russian roulette is complete safe."

"They say video games teach kids bad habits, but I've gotten out of at least 17 DUI's by flinging a banana peel at the cop car behind me."

"What do you call a Hispanic midget? A paragraph. He's too short to be called esse."

"If you eat too many salted pretzels on Halloween, what happens the next day? November thirst."

"Cross-Eyed Monster: When I grow up I want to be a bus driver. Witch: Well I won't stand in your way."

"I decided to email Ted Kaczynski yesterday Edit : wow, my inbox blew up"

"My friend recently visited London. He said everyone was very polite, except in Greenwich. Whenever he asked someone for the time they got all mean about it."

"People always misuse ""ironic"". It's so ironic..."

"What do you get when you cross Holy Water with castor oil? A religious movement!"