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Joke of the Day

"[sees girl reading The Catcher in the Rye] ""Ah I love that book. The way he just [clenches fist] catches all that frickin rye."""

"Some idiot in a nightclub came up to me and said, ""I get 20 times more girls than you do, haha. ""I replied, 20 x 0 = 0."""

"I get it grandma. I'm not sure what to do on Facebook either."

"*breaks into your house at night* *finds your bedroom* *blows on you til you wake up* HI I'M CHET CAN I INTEREST YOU IN A SECURITY SYSTEM?"

"If someone tries to assassinate Trump what will the secret service shout? ""Donald, duck"""

"Where does a zookeeper hang his laundry? On a clothes lion."

"Islam is a religion of piece. A piece of you here, there, everywhere."

"Imagine how hard you'd cry if you found out your mom had been eaten by a wolf WHILE you were chopping onions."

"Two Blondes walk into a bar They both fall on the ground, stunned from pain."

"Today on ""Dora the Explorer"", Dora and Boots learn there are some places they can't explore when Map leads them to an armed border patrol."