195419

Joke of the Day

"Her: It's disgusting how many dirty habits you have. Me: THE NUNS PAY ME GOOD MONEY TO DO THIER LAUNDRY OK???"

"So Darwin comes across a sad penguin in an airport.... He goes up to the penguin and asks, ""Why so angry, you cute little fella?"" The penguin looks up to him and says ""flight's delayed."""

"Mountains are not funny. They're hill-areas."

"(-i)^2=-1. Moral: If you fiddle with imaginary problems too much, shit's gonna get real."

"What kind of vehicle swerved to miss a talking lizard in the road? Dodged-a-Rango"

"Resistance training But me dragging my kids into school."

"Man's March (on Washington) Can be observed every day at 8am. Also known as going to work."

"Saw 10: nickelback on repeat for 24 hours and to get out of the room you have to talk to Ann Coulter."

"Classic Russian Reversal Old one, but I still find it funny: In America, you go out to find a party. In Soviet Union, party finds you!"

"mars: I'm wet.... NASA: I'm coming over!"