194840

Joke of the Day

"Twas the night before Christmas, all through the house not a creature was stirring not even my vodka martini because it's shaken not stirred"

"What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off before I jump on a trampoline"

"What martial art do cows practice? Moo-thai."

"Last night, I poked a woman in the eye with my penis She's gone a bit cockeyed since."

"What do you call a blind asian man A blind asian man you racist shit"

"Sex with mentally disabled ppl (okay for work) What kind of disease did the guy get when he skipped the condom and plowed a girl with down's syndrome? . . . Slow clap"

"How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to *WANT* to change."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bart ! Bart who ? Bart-enders serve drinks !"

"Why did the banker resign? His customers lost interest in him."

"If you're clever, what do you call a german waffle house? Luftwaffle!"