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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a Vagina and a Refrigerator? A Fridge doesn't fart when you take your meat out."

"They said Brexit would let us get closer to non-EU countries. They were right, we now have more in common with Zimbabwe than ever before."

"I've just de-flowered a virgin. I mugged a Pokemon Go player coming out of a florists."

"Even if you disagree with his politics you have to admit that for a second term president he doesn't even look pregnant."

"Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves at the same time he does."

"What do you call it, when a German sleeps with two women, but impregnates three? Fucking efficient."

"A photon walks into a bar... And he asks the barman for some peanuts. The barman says ""Sorry, we don't serve light snacks."""

"I saw a rabbi blessing food while golfing. I mentioned that it seemed strange, but he told me it's parve for the course."

"Parenting tip: Unplug the microwave before dropping acid because you'll inevitably put the baby in there for safe keeping."

"I love watching kids running in the park... They have no idea I'm shooting blanks"