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Joke of the Day
"Rosa Parks her ass on the bus seat"
Next Joke
"Here's another great thing about hot tubs [pulls out a bowl of fully cooked ramen from under the water]"
"People always say that obesity runs in their family... I don't know about you but in my family obesity waddles in my family"
"Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? Because sheep can hear a zipper up to a mile away"
"I was gonna go on a double date the other day... But in the end I couldn't find three other people to go with me."
"Just cleaned out my desk. Bad news: I apparently have 1,453 Sharpies and none of them are sharp. Good news: I found the plane!"
"I saw a guy today with soot all over his face carrying a large pick axe and wearing a royal blue hardhat that matched his overalls. But these are just miner details."
"American Apparel has really cornered the market on the modern, independent date rape victim."
"Ever say hi to someone and immediately regret it because now you know you have to say hi to them forever?"
"Justin Bieber songs are much more enjoyable when you replace the word ""girl"" with ""gerbil""."